there is a trick i know about sandwiches

OK, I know this awesome thing that makes your sandwiches taste better -- put both butter and mayonnaise on the bread, butter first. Believe me, it is pretty tasty. I have tested this on turkey, roast beef, and ham, and my taste-enjoyment went up significantly in all three cases. I also ate a control sandwich made of actual sand to establish the base taste-enjoyment level for sandwiches.

I admit that this was not my idea -- I read about it in "The Winter of our Discontent" by John Steinbeck, which is about a guy who makes sandwiches and then walks into the ocean. However, I got to wondering, because people who are good writers, such as Steinbeck, are sometimes good at other things, like finding new ways to increase the tastiness of a sandwich.

Overall, I am very pleased with the results of my experiment thus-far. If you would like to conduct independent research to corroborate the results of my findings, it would really help me out. I plan to test the following sandwiches next: chicken, corned beef, BLT, PB&J, and sand again (just to make sure it wasn't a fluke).



tribute to voight

Well, Voight has been dead for a month, and I can now end this period of self-imposed silence. The poor guy fought his helium loss until the end, but as they say, helium loss is just a part of life. I'm moving on, and I don't think I will adopt again. It was just too painful to watch a friend waste away before my eyes.