3.13.2006

opposable thumbs are not as important as we like to think

Considering our close encounter with the carjacked bank robber, and the gang of children who really-really wanted ice cream, I realize that there is no other option -- Oedipus is going to have to learn to use a gun. He may think it is a fun game to be a guard dog, but it is completely unfair to make him fight crime while naked. Batman's costume may leave frighteningly little to the imagination (picture George Clooney's womanly nipples), but at least he has a utility belt and a mask to hide his shame.

I think that Oedipus would appreciate a little kelvar doggie sweater and a six-shooter. And don't make some joke about needing opposable thumbs. Animals shoot people all the time.

dls

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